Gas Station Websites
Why do gas station's need website's? Because their hilarliously awful!*

Sunday, January 23, 2005
Steve's Grand Stop Marathon

At first glance, this one appears pretty normal. There home page sports a decent picture of the gas station, some fancy drop down menus, and the ubiquitous American flag/eagle collage at the top.

There is one curious thing on the home page:
We have the Best Lebanese and American Food in town. Our Food is Fresh and simply the Best.
Hmm... Lebanese food, and interesting capitalization. Promising.

On closer inspection, it becomes apparent that about half of the items on those fancy menus (including "Contact Us") don't work.

Let's check out those Lebanese dishes. I know when I want some really good BabaGanouge or Shish Kafta I'm heading for the closest gas station.

We Are Located In The Beautiful City Of Farmington Michigan on The Corner Of Grand River and Power Road. Farmington Auto Service Farmington Hills Auto Repair Marathon Gas Station We Also Carry Firestone,Goodyear and Cooper Tires

Is that a sentence or the title of a book? This might help.

Our Goal is Fix it Right The First Time With Clean ,Fast and Friendly Service

- and to sometimes peer around our computer to stare at you.
- and to not use the word "to."
- and to not quite grasp the technical aspects of using a comma.
- and to capitalize every word except "is," "it," and "and." Yes, that includes capitalizing "The."

What really put this over the top, as is often the case, was the lovingly crafted tribute to the crew.

Sam is an Awesome Technician who does whatever it takes to get the job done, besides being a fine Technician Sam has also played Professional Volleyball in International Competitions.

The first question I always ask all my Technicians is if they have played Professional Volleyball.

Bob Keeps The Coffee Fresh and is always Happy to help. He is always at the Front Counter with a Smile waiting to Serve You. Stop in and say Hi to this Wonderful guy.

That's all well and good, but has he ever played Professional Volleyball in International Competitions? Because if he hasn't, I'm going to have a hard time calling him a Wonderful guy.

This site truly is a grand stop.


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*I never thought I had to do this, but I guess I gave some of my readers too much credit. The four (yes, there are four, not one or two like most of the grammar "experts" point out) errors in the tagline are indeed intentional. It's called irony. Thank you. (For those of you that got it, congratulations.)