Why do gas station's need website's? Because their hilarliously awful!*
Monday, January 31, 2005
Shady Cove 76 Taco Bell Express
Update! This site has been removed. You now get redirected to some great webcam images of traffic.
They also closed the image directory and put a really hilarlious image in its place.
It's all in good fun... I hope.
Another great mixture of gasoline and food awaits you in Shady Cove, Oregon.
■ Fill up "both" tanks when you visit us!
Or more accurately, "Fill up 'both' tanks with gas when you visit us!"
■ Saw Blade Art! The Shady Cove Mini Mart features paintings on saws.
Beautiful and deadly.
■ This is a 25" diameter saw with acrylic painting of Oregon's Mt.Hood, by Northwest artist David Squyres. The hole has been patched in the center. .
Whew. I hate having holes in my saws that have painting of mountains on them.
■ Hey, Shady Cove... doesn't Taco Bell sound good right now?
■ The Shady Cove Taco Bell Express features both drive- through and walk-in ordering.
How about unicycle-through? Pogostick-in?
Hey, look! There's an open image directory.
Someone tore a hole in my web browser, and I can see a guy with a fish through it!
That's no moon, it's a space station.
Sunday, January 30, 2005
SMiCkster's Truck Stop
This isn't an actual truck stop, but I don't know what it really is either.
■ Hello, and welcome to my truck stop. The only truck stop in the world that won't leave a bad taste in your mouth...trust me I know, I'm a trucker's daughter!
I'm not going to touch that one. Or her.
■ Here you will find other truckers, useful stuff and all out fun! I've created this site for all the great truckers out there to be helpful and useful to you all! If you are not a trucker feel free to stay anyway! This Site is always changing so visit often. Also this site has sound be sure and turn it up!
Oh yes, bad MIDI.
Pardon me while I have an epileptic seizure.
Surely this must be the ugliest site on the web...
Except that is has an entire page devoted to the many awards it has received for being so terrific. The awards include the coveted "Kerrmite's Kewl Website Award."
SMiCkster also included several handsome banners to use to link to her site. My personal favorite uses the ever-popular dual squashed maps of the United States for its background.
This smiley face looks constipated.
■ I'm happily married with one child. I'm a trucker's Daughter and I have a lot of pride in what my father does. So I felt that there should be a site that is contributed to the trucker!
■ I enjoy the Web and It's the information highway so why not have a site for the real highway men and women.
Now that is just plain old clever.
■ The Website you are currently visiting, belongs to an I.A.W.M.D. "Member in Good Standing"
For those of you who may not know, the I.A.W.M.D. is the International Association of Webmasters & Designers. Its members share one unique trait: they are all blind.
Saturday, January 29, 2005
Bob's Auto Spa
I was torn between titling this one "Bob's Auto Spa" or "Southern Skye the home of Bob's Auto Spa." I have no idea what Southern Skye is. There should be a website explaining it somewhere.
Here is a nice picture of the desert with the gas station.. I mean the Auto Spa in the background.
■ All facilities offer clean, large, and well lighted restrooms. Office located N32.15.599 W110.43.551 Alt2,700ft.
I can finally put my handheld GPS unit to good use.
■ Inside the store is the Arby's restaurant with substantial setting, plus a drive-up window for customers who don't want to get out of there car.
Those darn lazy customers. Why don't they want to get out of there car? They don't want to walk from their to hair?
■ For the RV and trailer motoring public Cortaro Pueblo Chevron offers a sewer dump plus water and propane.
I thought that was a wine rack, not a sewer dump. Maybe they mean you dump your sewage right on the floor?
■ Midvale Park Chevron is the first in Arizona to generate it's electrical requirements using a co-generation system. The co-gen system uses Southwest Gas (natual gas) as fuel to produce electric.
I have to get some of that natual gas to produce my own electric.
By the way, I wouldn't really use that as the opening sentence and picture for my gas station website. I'd go with a nice picture of the gas station and a sentence like "Buy gas here."
Friday, January 28, 2005
Fairfax Circle Chevron
It's snowing! It's snowing on the web! That's amazing!
■ Enter Your Mail-Id to Receive Exciting Offers
My Mail's Id is in a constant struggle with its Superego, so it doesn't have time for Exciting Offers.
Our staff comes in three flavors: Beard, Goatee, and Classic.
Something not quite right about Beard. His beard and hair don't match.
■ Mr. R.L. Varma has been a diplomat through out his career. He has traveled through out the world and has also worked for the Indian Embassy in Washington DC.
He now owns a snowy gas station.
■ Mr. Robert Varma (Son of Mr. R.L. Varma) graduated from Howard University with BSSE (Bachelor of Science in Electrical Engineering) and specialization in communications.
And he has utilized that degree in electrical engineering to wire up our neon Open sign.
Every one of the email links sends an email to the same address. Big Brother is watching.
■ " We Specialize in all phases of Automotive repair "
How do you specialize in all phases?
Thursday, January 27, 2005
Some sites just don't have enough material for a full post, but still deserve to be honored as Gas Station Websites. We put a bunch of them together and call it Quick Hits.
Garden Grove Shell
■ Follow the links on the left... Please follow more of the links on the left...
There are no links on the left! Stop telling me to use them!
Good lord, I sure hope there is a lock on the room to the Shower Room. I for one would not want to walk in to do some laundry and find someone sitting in the back there.
Dan Usner Shell Auto Care
Some lady keeps talking to me. Someone shut her up.
■ Please update your FAQ/About Us description.
Don't tell me what to do.
South Park Tire & Auto Center
Psst. You might want to work this in somehow.
Instead, we have to look at this.
This was the best picture we could find of our establishment.
■ Please visit these sites soon...
Bayleaf Tire & Auto Service
Holy crap, that lady is back again.
■ "Aboriginal Enterprise at Work"
We will break our own arms to provide you world class service at aboriginal prices!
Amoco BP Auto Service Center
"Don't worry Barry, the list will line up when it's rendered in Netscape 2.0."
This makes me dizzy in a good way.
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Iowa 80 Truckstop
■ Visit the World's Largest Truckstop!
Say no more. I'm there.
■ Our second floor was designed just for truckers!
Damn! I was really looking forward to seeing the second floor of the World's Largest Truckstop. Good thing they have an online tour.
I bet your local gas station doesn't have its own ferris wheel.
Or its own book.
Cream Corn Delite and Sara Bell Louise are the Official Dogs of Gas Station Websites. Better luck next time, Francie, Lizzie, and Sassy Sue.
Start planning your roadtrip for this summer to see the brand new Trucking Hall of Fame. You'll find all your favorite truckers enshrined there. Truckers like the monkey from BJ and the Bear.
Send in your resumes, because as their Employment Opportunities page states, Iowa 80 Truckstop is "A Place Where People Want to Work." That pretty much says it all.
■ Whether you are looking for a fun part-time job or an exciting new career, Iowa 80 Group has just what you’re looking for.
You too can start an exciting new career at the Blimpie's in a truckstop.
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Greenbelt Auto & Truck Repair, Inc.
Did we mention we have 20 years of service?! Because we do. Just wanted to make sure you knew that.
■ As near as your neighbor.
I'm pretty sure my neighbor is closer than a gas station in Maryland.
■ Hello again, well looks like we made it through the winter and summer is well on it's way ! GOOD THING TOO, I had enough of the cold!
It's January. I don't think that qualifies as summer.
Something is seriously wrong with this car. It looks like it's trying to blow up a balloon.
■ The Mobil station is as near as your neighbor
Again with the lying. My neighbor is mere feet away. Maryland is at least seven miles away. Probably more, I don't know. I'm not very good at geography. I'm no Chris Fortier.
Most gas stations have pictures of their crew. Not this one. It has pictures of the certifications held by the crew. They're not people, they're paper. It's nice that they include a few nice comments about the experience and training of every member of the staff. Well, almost every member. Joe Aulisio, I'm looking at you.
■ We like to share a bit of the history which we created. Mr. Joe Aulisio & Mr. William Novick, some know him as "Duce" or Bill, were both employees at the MOBIL station back in 1970‘s during our high school years. Not having a clue about business, we worked for Woody and George enjoying our teen years. We often wondered and said, "what would it be like to own this one day??"
"Hey Duce, what say we buy dis place?" I like the switch between third and first person. It's very disorienting.
■ Welcome to our Hot Links page!
Brought to you by Knight Rider.
Monday, January 24, 2005
Golden State Career Videos - Service Station Attendants
Many of you are probably interested in the exciting world of gas station attendance, but just don't know how to get started. Luckily, the California Career Resource Network provides just this occupation in their wonderful series of Career Videos.
■ The work of a service station attendant varies, depending on the type of services the station provides.
■ In many places, attendants spend most of their time in a booth, activating fuel pumps for self-service customers, collecting money, and providing change.
Most attendants spend their time in other kinds of booths too, but they aren't collecting money.
■ Since many stations also sell sodas, bread, magazines and other items, some parts of the job are identical to that of a convenience store clerk.
Listen to how the narrator enunciates "bread." I have just that word on repeat on my iPod.
■ At more traditional service stations, job responsibilities are more varied.
Not like those new-fangled gas stations that sell bread.
■ Attendants provide more hands-on, full services, such as pumping gas, checking under the hood, and checking tire pressure. In addition, they may sell oil, wiper blades, and other automotive products to customers.
They may also pressure their hands on customers and spread oil with wiper blades "under the hood."
■ By providing prompt, cheerful service, they can encourage people to come back again.
Well, either that, or it's because they run out of gas and need to buy more.
■ They may also help prevent accidents, by noticing whether a customer's tires are low, or if a headlight is out.
Gas station attendant as defender of public safety. They also rescue kittens from trees from time to time.
■ Work schedules tend to be flexible, making this an ideal part-time or after-school job.
Translation: "This job is ideal for aimless drifters. You can come and go as you please. What are they going to do? Fire you? Big deal. Just get a job at a different gas station."
■ So if you like cars, enjoy interacting with people, and don't mind working in all kinds of whether, this is a great entry-level job that could someday lead to the owning or managing of a small gas station, or large, busy, full-service station.
Or if you enjoy being paid to "service" lonely women.
Do you have to not mind working in all kinds of "whether" if you work in one of those booths? Because that's the one I want. Sitting in a booth being paid to collect money, sell bread, and "service" the customers.
Sign me up.
Sunday, January 23, 2005
Steve's Grand Stop Marathon
At first glance, this one appears pretty normal. There home page sports a decent picture of the gas station, some fancy drop down menus, and the ubiquitous American flag/eagle collage at the top.
There is one curious thing on the home page:
■ We have the Best Lebanese and American Food in town. Our Food is Fresh and simply the Best.
Hmm... Lebanese food, and interesting capitalization. Promising.
On closer inspection, it becomes apparent that about half of the items on those fancy menus (including "Contact Us") don't work.
Let's check out those Lebanese dishes. I know when I want some really good BabaGanouge or Shish Kafta I'm heading for the closest gas station.
■ We Are Located In The Beautiful City Of Farmington Michigan on The Corner Of Grand River and Power Road. Farmington Auto Service Farmington Hills Auto Repair Marathon Gas Station We Also Carry Firestone,Goodyear and Cooper Tires
Is that a sentence or the title of a book? This might help.
■ Our Goal is Fix it Right The First Time With Clean ,Fast and Friendly Service
- and to sometimes peer around our computer to stare at you.
- and to not use the word "to."
- and to not quite grasp the technical aspects of using a comma.
- and to capitalize every word except "is," "it," and "and." Yes, that includes capitalizing "The."
What really put this over the top, as is often the case, was the lovingly crafted tribute to the crew.
■ Sam is an Awesome Technician who does whatever it takes to get the job done, besides being a fine Technician Sam has also played Professional Volleyball in International Competitions.
The first question I always ask all my Technicians is if they have played Professional Volleyball.
■ Bob Keeps The Coffee Fresh and is always Happy to help. He is always at the Front Counter with a Smile waiting to Serve You. Stop in and say Hi to this Wonderful guy.
That's all well and good, but has he ever played Professional Volleyball in International Competitions? Because if he hasn't, I'm going to have a hard time calling him a Wonderful guy.
This site truly is a grand stop.
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Continuing our theme of websites that are absolutely bizarre and tangentially related to gas stations, I give you Le Centre. Let me try to describe it. A guy takes pictures of gas stations, grocery stores, restaurants and retail stores, and posts them on the web. I have no idea why he does this. This is the closest he comes to an explanation.
■ Their are many of the same stores across the world. Each with their own unique look. This is a look at the same, but different.
■ This site was, mostly, designed in 1400x1050.
For more about the fascinating man behind this site, you can visit his main page, which is part of The Bill Burmaster Family of Web Sites.
Other gems from The Bill Burmaster Family of Web Sites include:
- Everything you ever wanted to know about Interstate 64, Indiana
- The Oklahoma State Capital as seen from Interstate 235, Oklahoma City.
- The air board for KFIN-FM.
- Bill Burmaster's Senior Year Picture.
- Stats of Bill Burmaster, featuring: "Spouse: 1 Wife, Melony."
Good thing he specified just one wife, otherwise I might think he was weird.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
Shell on the Antoine Level
Does a gas station made out of LEGO deserve its own website? Why not.
■ Our mechanics are clean-cut, intelligent, friendly, and you can a great discussion on historical events within America and the world with them while they fix your car, truck, Bubba-truck, mini-van, Rolls Royce, Hum-Vee, or any other vehicle that exists.
It's near Downtown Tower.
This is by far the most intricate website I've ever seen for a LEGO city. I'm thankful it included a Shell station, otherwise I never would have found it.
I could devote two weeks to this site and not even scratch the surface. I invite you browse around and link to your favorite parts in the comments.
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Welcome to a historical pictorial of a gas station and a blizzard.
■ The Fortys, The Fiftys, The Sixtys
Jundt's: Where spelling and coherence is optional!
The aliens are landing.
I like the intuitive navigation to the next page. Good thing they told me to "Click on Picture Below," or I would have missed some real gems.
■ HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF THE JUNDT'S. LET US KNOW ON OUR E-MAIL
■ Beard growing contest- Fred jr.-Emil-Fred sr.
I think Fred Sr. is the clear favorite here.
■ My wife WOW
I wish I knew what was happening out of frame. I bet it's erotic.
Jundt's: Now with Home made tractor goodness.
■ GIRL MAGNET
I'll take your word for it.
■ Wow 1976
Wow? The only thing that made me say "wow" was the fact you spelled 1976 correctly.
And the moment you were waiting for... Blizard of 66
Thinking the Blizard wasn't a strong enough closer, Jundt's went with some animated graphics. First, an attempt at hypnosis.
■ Your getting sleepy
Then, a shocking revelation.
■ Dont you wish all us frogs could do that.
Yes. Mr. Jundt reveals that he is indeed a frog. That explains the background, and why this site is "Powered by MSN TV." It all makes sense now.
Now if you'll excuse me, I need to practice for the next beard growing contest.
Note: Some of the direct image links appear broken. Refreshing your browser on the error page seems to fix the problem. Thank you MSN TV.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Shell Station Uithuizen
I sure hope you speak Dutch. Luckily, bad website design and funny pictures are the international language.
I dig their minimalist banner frame.
Someone forgot to tell Emiel that he was supposed to look right into the camera while leaning on the sign. At least he and Roland go to the same barber.
I would like to purchase several diverse looney tunes popouts. No, I don't need to see a picture of them.
Nothing sells gas like a picture of a kid on a bike.
Due to our frequent explosions, the local fire department is always on-site, ready to climb ladders and hold branches.
Come see our broken sign.
■ Our shop, already is these only 19m2 large, included innumerable products. Because the shop is in principle small, the assortment has also arranged as a result, with the so-called ' runners '. - Translated
That's still a lot more coherent than most of the gas station websites I've seen.
Monday, January 17, 2005
Syarikat Anda Service Station
Bad gas station websites are not a purely American phenonemon. Witness the Syarikat Anda Service Station site from Malaysia.
■ So Drive In.......And Drive Out......Smiling
Be careful not to look at the animated car image too long. It could cause a seizure.
I adore the hand-drawn map. I just can't figure out how he hand-drew the animated angel looking through the telescope.
■ I'm sorry, our staff is all on leave. So we rounded up a few ragtags off the street, dressed them up (after giving them a shower) and took a picture. Thanks guys. We like our staff to be in tiptop condition in order to be able to serve you better so every morning each of them performs the recommended physical exercises.
I don't know what the woman on the right is doing, but I don't think that exercise is recommended.
■ Your car's OK! but are You?
I think the real question is, are you okay? I mean, your name is Ah Kok.
Be sure to attend Kok's Kar Klinic the next time you're in Malaysia.
Read about Miss Fifi's Favourite Five. You figure it out.
Sunday, January 16, 2005
I tried. I really did. But I just can't figure out this site. The title of the posting above links to the History page with some lovely midi.
Clicking the "Home" button at the top brings up this page, because it's always good to have your main web page coerce your visitors to upgrade their browsers without any indication of what your site is for.
Of course, the "Click here to enter my site" link is broken.
Okay, now that we have that settled, on to the site.
■ Click on the map to browse
Clicking on the "map" (which just contains an error message), brings up yet another error message:
■ Unrecognized format. Unable to locate settings family
I hope someone finds the poor Settings family soon. Susie Settings is afraid of the dark.
I think we also found the source of all the midi that appears on gas station websites from around the world. Thank you, WavQueen.
There's also a Fun Kids' Stuff page. I give up trying to understand this site. This page has more midi, a lot of flashing graphics and a homemade Nickelodeon logo.
■ Before you return to my cover sheet -- (uh, wait -- you mean this isn't a fax?) -- check out my church! (I'm the organist.) I'm the web coordinator for the church... And the more hits the better. :) Here, lemme help. Click here to go back to the toolbar at the top.
Enough. I give up. No more. Please.
■ Yes, it's true... I'm a lover of sound. Good sound, preferably. (An example of bad sound might be, say, your stomach growling in the middle of a silent prayer; or perhaps a creaking noise in the attic when you're home alone!)
Saturday, January 15, 2005
Quick Hits is a new feature on Gas Station Websites that comments on sites that don't quite warrant their own posting, but are still pretty hilarlious.
Moses' Walnut 76
Submitted by Derek Woo.
That flashing Free Gas link sure looks tempting, but then you get to the fine print. It's only free if you pay for something else. I'd expect more honesty from a man named Moses.
You can contact Moses, Larry and Duff. I guess they fired Curly.
These coupons sure are pretty. It's good to know this one is good for "most cars."
Thanks for the submission, Derek!
A & T Tire & Auto Care Center
■ "Complete auto repair service"
Everything is complete except for the links. Those words in the frame on the left that look like links? They aren't links.
■ A Consumer Guide Gasoline Octane for Cars!
As opposed to...?
Honorable mention for the page transition.
Royson's Blythewood Automotive
Not very funny at first glance, but it does include this picture and this link:
■ Click here to hear Bobby explain what service with integrity means.. WMA 06:17
Yes. This is a six minute interview with the owner of the establishment. Why anyone would be interested in hearing about the owner's grandma is beyond me. Highlights include the interviewer's cell phone ringing at 2:38 and someone coming in asking for the keys to the Cavalier at 4:47 (by the way, it's 117). It's too bad there isn't a way to edit audio files. Someone should invent that.
Friday, January 14, 2005
Joe's Towing and Recovery
■ "The TOWfessionals" For all your towing needs.
That is one delicious pun.
I couldn't possibly write anything to make this picture funnier.
■ We can tow Anything
Make sure you scroll down to see the Car Fishing section:
■ Seriously, we were called out by Adams County Sheriff Dept. to pull a vehicle out of a pond, Actually, there were 3 vehicles in this pond. It seems that this is a favorite dumping spot for stolen vehicles. They just left the other 2 vehicles in the pond because they belonged to the guy that owned the property the pond is on.
So someone stole two of the guy's cars, and dumped them in his own pond? Something sounds FISHY! Get it?! FISHY?! POND?! TOWFESSIONALS!
View our Guestbook where our customers complain about us!
In the "Archives" guestbook, you can see gems like this:
■ i am here and i love this site pls keep off.
But the single best feature about this site is the link to their very own online store!
■ Now YOU can look like one of the "CREW" at Joe's Towing & Recovery in Denver, Colorado!
I plan on purchasing the Dog T-Shirt.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Burke's Denrock Mobil
Burke better be getting some dough from Budweiser for that commercial. Excellent sound quality, by the way.
You might want to crop that Mobil image too. Just a suggestion.
Only one NASCAR PIC from 2003? Burke, I am disappointed in you.
■ Burke's Mobil is a family run business for over 25 years.
■ At Burke's Mobil we know your car is an expensive investment. That deserves our quality care.
It looks like two sentences, but it's not two sentences.
■ In memory of #3 Dale Earnhart.
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
This pretty much says it all:
■ Noonan's was established in 1961 by partners Butch Noonan and Itchy Loundagin.
Itchy Loundagin is the single best name ever devised by mankind.
Excellent sound effects, but next time, try using MIDI. I'm talking to you, Rhiannon and Tyler.
Noonan's is friends with a truck and the New York Yankees.
■ 10% Total Discount by Downloading/Printing this page
If I have to download and print it, you can keep your lousy 10%.
Is it Speedy Lube or Spedi Lube? I need to know for tax purposes.
Art Clipp keeps getting electrocuted when he touches his large tool to this car, but he never learns his lesson. Mr. Clipp, those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
This place has everything: Gas (and Fuel), Restaurant (featuring All You Can Eat Tacos on Tuesday nights for only $3.55 and Not Very French Toast), Deli, Motel, Convenience Store, Casino, Laundry, Showers, Crafter's Market and Leroy's Sports Book.
The Truck Inn is heartily endorsed by the cast of Hee Haw.
■ Showers Voted "Best in the West"
I demand a recount.
■ Leroy's Race and Sports Book
I wouldn't trust my money to a man who won't stand, or even turn around, for his picture in front of his sports book located in a gas station/casino.
Paul Tolbert was the last Employee of the Month. No one has won since then because Paul won't give the balloons back.
Utensils are optional at the Truck Inn!
"This is the second most romantic gas station you've ever taken me to, Herb."
Monday, January 10, 2005
The Shell Gang
If you always thought working at a Shell sounded like a blast, you were right! Luisa has photographically documented how much fun it really is to work at a Shell station in Canada.
■ Update: Athena has moved on to bigger and better things! She's no longer a Shell Girl ;)
Translation: Athena realized she was way too hot to be working at a gas station. She's now living with a dude with his own Camaro.
■ Luisa and Steve. Ambulance, Fire or Police: Which would you like us to call for you? Don't mess with us!
Apparently there are emergencies at this gas station all the time. Although the threat at the end seems to imply that the emergencies are caused by the staff. Either way, I will be giving this particular gas station a wide berth for safety's sake.
■ Steve is always sleepy... It's been a Long Never Winter Night once again!
I hate those Long Never Winter Nights.
■ FRED, a.k.a. Petunia
If I were a girl named Fred, I'm not sure I would want Petunia to be my nickname.
■ TRAINEE 2 (KYLE) Update: FIRED! Didn't last 2 months! He Just didn't give a sh!t about anything...
Kyle has been accused of not caring about his job at a gas station on someone's website about the people that work at the gas station. I hope Kyle will be able to pick up the pieces and move on with his life. At least he can take comfort in his gigantic ring.
Saturday, January 08, 2005
L & M Phillips 66
The devil went down to Georgia and designed this gas station website. Incidentally, this gas station is located in Kansas.
■ We are no longer able to accpet Phillips 66 cards. We do not meet the new image of Phillips 66. Therefore Phillips 66 has dropped their account with us that allowed us to accept your Phillips 66 cards. We are sorry for any inconvenience this might cause you.
Really makes you wonder what this place looks like, doesn't it? L & M cares so much about their customers, they tell them the reason why their Phillips 66 cards will no longer be accepted. Was part of the reason not being able to spell "accepted"?
■ Right now we are offering $10 off wash, wax and vacuum service for your car or van or pickup to get it ready for the lake and upcoming Memorial Day Holiday.
I hate to ask, but which upcoming Memorial Day Holiday? 2002?
That's a sweet Camaro driving across the page.
There's the current date and time at the bottom of the page. The next time someone asks for the time, you can just navigate to http://www.geocities.com/lnm_phillips66/LnM_phillips66.html, scroll to the bottom of the page, and tell them.
Gem from the guestbook: "I found your website amazing."
The "next page" has one of the worst (best?) under construction graphics of all time. The construction workers eyes fall out of his head! Repeatedly!
Friday, January 07, 2005
This one only has a single page, but what a page! It's been able to combine some staples of GSW: blinking animated graphics, pictures of the staff (with captions!), bizarre punctuation, and a terrible background.
■ Paul Cole,Mechanic and woman's man
■ Jon Chesbrough aka cheeseburg
■ Ray Rust, tow driver and fellow diet dew drinker, and comedienne
Is Ray the Buick?
■ Tim Atkins, office,gas jockey and the guy who made this
We finally have a picture of the author of one of these sites.
The filename for the T-REX photo is trex22222.jpg. I would like to see the other 22,221 pictures they have of T_REX.
There's only one entry in the Guestbook, but it's from Big Daddy.
There's a Dancing Homer thrown in for good measure at the bottom too.
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
Jeff's Bobby and Steve's Auto World
Yes, the name of this place is Jeff's Bobby and Steve's Auto World. Apparently, Bobby and Steve started an AutoWorld. It was so popular that a guy named Jeff opened a franchise in the chain and called it Jeff's Bobby and Steve's Auto World. No, this name is not confusing.
■ Or, you can insert the required amount of cash and your starting your ride. Enjoy !
■ As you get pushed through the wash, look around inside your vehicle and on your way out, stop by our vacuums and get your car looking like new. We also have cleaning tools like, armor all to protect your dash from the sun. We have all the tools to detail your vehicle all in one stop, Jeff's Bobby and Steve's Auto World.
■ We all love Ice Cream, that's why Jeff's Bobby and Steve's features Bridgeman's Ice Cream ! Buy a cone or go for the gold and buy a carton, we've got it. As a local favorite, it will soon win your taste and become your favorite as well, if it hasn't already !
I have to go get some Jeff's Bobby and Steve's Bridgeman's ice cream.
■ So, your propane tank is thirsty ? We've got the solution - offering Propane Exchange.
■ Your Gas Pumps
■ Swipe your plastic right at the counter, and your on your way ! Convenience, think Jeff's Bobby and Steve's Auto World.
No gas station website is complete without pictures of the staff. Flattering. This guy is on here twice... maybe he's Jeff's, Bobby or Steve's.
Say hello to Webby.
Monday, January 03, 2005
Twin Towers Service Station
Needs more MIDI!
It's a good thing they told me it's the "Twin Towers Service Station Online." I almost didn't realize it was online and tried to gas up my Mercury Cougar with my monitor.
Buy gas here or this tiger will eat your car!
Music by Lynyrd Skynyrd, logo by MS Paint.
Ladies and gentlemen, the world's slowest slideshow.
■ Please understand that part of this inspection involves taking photographs of your car. To achieve the high quality photographs that are required, the weather must be clement. We can not perform insurance inspections during rain, snow, or on overcast days. Please respect our decision, as we know what is acceptable.
You better not plan on getting in an accident on a cloudy day.
Sunday, January 02, 2005
Oww. I don't know where to start. Just try to read it.
■ If you need a jerk, call the Turk.
■ FOR SALE NOW WC's(Bill Butt's) Mini convertible(It's Official!SOLD& on it's way to ToTo land,yep:KansasKeep an eye out for it on the Great Plains!
I have got to meet Bill Butt.
■ Toys from Argentina made with wire
Who wouldn't want to see that?
Okay, it's not exactly a gas station website, but it was close enough and funny enough to include.
Saturday, January 01, 2005
Hinton Country Inn/Convenience Store/Gas Station
Nice webcam picture of an atlas. This really helps me find your wonderful establishment.
Make sure you provide your fax number if you plan on sending an email.
■ For a Great Place to Stay, Visit Our Motel Today! (We hope you don't mind the fumes from our gas station!)
Anatomy of a GSWMany people have asked what it takes to become a Gas Station Website. The more of the following, the better. The GSW tagline has several examples of these.
Named to the My Yahoo! Editors' Picks
Named a Yahoo! New and Notable Site - 01/14/2005
*I never thought I had to do this, but I guess I gave some of my readers too much credit. The four (yes, there are four, not one or two like most of the grammar "experts" point out) errors in the tagline are indeed intentional. It's called irony. Thank you. (For those of you that got it, congratulations.)