Primo's

Another one page wonder.

■ The aromas of Broasted Chicken, Pizza and a vast selection of hot and cold deli sandwiches drift throughout the store and await your tastebud's pleasure.

I always thought my nose was pleasured by aromas.

■ Everyone forgets to pack something and Primo's has thought ahead for those that do.

If everyone forgets, then there isn't a separate group of people made up of "those that do." It's everyone. And I resent being called forgetful.

■ And there's none of that last chance"how bad do you want it" mentality here.

What a scam. I have to pay extra for that at my local dominatrix's too.

■ Don't forget your munchies and hand packed ice cream for later.

I already asked you once to stop insinuating that I'm forgetful. Besides, I prefer my ice cream to be packed with some kind of utensil, not someone's dirty greasy hand. Yuck.

■ Gas, propane, Lotto, wine & spirts, and hot coffee with the latest fishing information. Everything you need in one convenient location.

No spirts for me, thank you. Besides, that's not everything I need. I can think of a few others...

- Saw Blade Art
- A trucker's daughter
- Sewer dump
- A shower room with an exposed toilet
- Aboriginal Enterprises
- Cream Corn Delite and Sara Bell Louise
- An exciting career at Blimpie's
- Photos of signs on I55
- An Awesome Technician who has played Professional Volleyball
- BabaGanouge and Shish Kafta
- Downtown Tower
- Beard growing contests
- Diverse looney tunes popouts
- Kok's Kar Klinic
- Homemade Nickelodeon logos
- Keys to the Cavalier
- Itchy Loundagin
- Athena
- Ray Rust
- Bill Butt's Mini convertible
- Unlimited clearance
- Dirty Larry's shirt
- Kliffi
- 5/5/5 deals

The "minds" behind Primo's website have this to say:
■ We like to think of ourselves as "a citadel of copious conceptualists concerned with composing a collage of classy custom creations, complementing our customer's characteristics".

They need one more word at the end of that sentence:

Crappily.

7:58 PM